I hit reduced in my life .
To climb out of this hole, I needed to wholly re-align myself. I needed to discover where I had gone wrong, and fix it .
here ’ s the thing.
I wasn’t living like a man.
But I made myself a predict. I swore that I wouldn ’ metric ton give up. I knew that I could succeed .
And therefore can you .
In this post, you ’ re going to learn the 31 things you can change to become a better man.
Every single one of these items are of invaluable importance to the travel of being a fully realized, successful serviceman in our modern universe .
And once you implement them, you ’ ll see potent changes .
I ’ m besides going to contribution the 3 most important things to prioritize now, to kick your journey into high gear.
here ’ s what you need to do .
How to Be a Better man : 31 actionable Tips
1. Get comfortable ‘ Being a man ’
We live in a global nowadays where it ’ south about ‘ forbidden ’ to be masculine .
But if we want to become knock-down, effective men, we need to let go of our acculturation ’ s weird ideas about humanness .
Learn to become comfortable in your own clamber. Own your maleness. Take pride in who and what you are .
This is undoubtedly the beginning step to becoming a better man .
2. Pay Your Bills and Wake Up on Time
In other words, get more responsible.
No more neglect placard payments. no more showing up for function former .
Show up to work on-time or 10 minutes early. Take manipulate of the things in your life that need to get done, and make certain that they get done on fourth dimension .
As Jordan Peterson says, “ Pick up your province. Pick up the heaviest thing you can, and carry it. ”
intercept staying up public treasury all hours of the night playing video games, then rolling into work belated, hung-over, and rest deprived .
Have more pride than that. You ’ ra able of so much more .
3. Run A Lot, and Pick Up Heavy Stuff
In other words— start working out .
Run, reach, and lift weights .
Make it a casual habit .
Whether it ’ s yoga, boxing, hike, etc. Get your body moving .
Increasing your exercise levels will drastically improve your health, get you laid more frequently, help you to feel better, and make you happier .
It barely makes you a better man—pure and simple .
4. Adopt a Healthier Diet
Drink more water system. Eat plenty of fresh vegetables, cut out debris food, and stop eating bullsh*t .
The statistics on fleshiness in the United States are absolutely shocking .
In 2017-2018, the prevalence of fleshiness in the US was 42.4 % .
Obesity-related conditions like Type 2 diabetes, certain types of cancer, and heart disease are on the rise .
You owe it to yourself to be better and healthier than that .
Cut out boodle. Eat raw foods that ’ ll nourish your body .
Fuel your body for performance, and you ’ ll start feel and performing better .
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5. Start Taking Your Lifestyle seriously
As a man, you have a certain prototype to uphold .
You besides have character, repute, and performance to consider .
You want to have productive relationships, a hot arouse liveliness, a dependable reputation, and to establish yourself as a man of honor, integrity, and grit .
This all comes toss off to the life style choices you make .
You get 24 hours every day to become the best man you ’ re capable of being .
How are you using your time ? What habits are you investing in ? How much time are you wasting on speechless stool that isn ’ t making your animation better ?
Go to the gymnasium, read a book, employment on your business—do anything that ’ ll result in better habits, better performance, better outcomes, and better virility .
We only get one animation, gentlemen. Start taking your life style badly .
6. public speaking of Style—Level That Up angstrom well
7 years ago, I had a shaved head, a bantam byssus, a big catgut, puny muscles, and a atrocious sense of dash .
I looked like a bald virgin potato. All I wore were huge t-shirts, discount jeans, and battered tennis shoes .
As a result, my sexual activity liveliness was basically nonexistent. I wasn ’ triiodothyronine taken seriously by anyone, and my self esteem was in the tank .
But, I turned it around—and if I can do it, anyone can do it .
exploit on your own personal dash. Start leveling up your clothing choices. Learn how to groom yourself properly. Go to a good barber to get a professional haircut. Get a professional byssus trim .
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Watch some YouTube videos about how to level-up your personal sense of style .
Find a good expect for your torso type, and rock it .
7. Hustle, Get Money, Repeat
The more you learn, the more you earn. – Warren Buffett
One of the most cringeworthy things I hear from men is this :
“ I don ’ thyroxine truly care about money. I ’ megabyte not greedy. I ’ thousand content with not having much. ”
A successful advanced man will understand that money is essential to leveling up and winning .
It isn ’ metric ton about having gorge .
It ’ south about pride, sociable condition, power, and having the fiscal exemption to live life on your own terms .
money is a valuable resource, and you need to understand how to create it for yourself. starting signal by getting the highest-paying job you can get. Be the hardest working man in the room, always.
then, at night, start learning a high income skill .
For me, this was freelancer spell .
Start a side hustle. finally, if you keep hustling, this side-hustle will replace your 9-to-5 income and seriously level-up your money game .
following, work on build up businesses, investments, websites, or other hustles .
Chase that money. Level up your income. Wake up every day with a ‘ have skills, will grind ’ mentality .
Women love it. other men respect it. Money goes hand in hand with condition and baron .
Own it, men .
8. Develop Tribe-Building and Leadership Abilities
If you want to become a better world in today ’ second global, you must understand the value of leadership .
Read The Art Of War by Sun Tzu. Follow it up with Radical Candor by Kim Scott .
Watch leadership video by experts like Gary Vaynerchuk .
sympathize that dominance hierarchies are real, and that climbing the hierarchy effectively gives you the office to not only affect greater positive change—but to besides level-up your life in countless ways .
Building a kin starts with your immediate friends and kin .
Start taking on the duty of organizing things and leading important projects .
Learn how to mitigate disagreements peacefully. Learn to encourage, console, and motivate others .
Don ’ triiodothyronine be afraid to step into that leadership role .
Take province, and make surely that team projects succeed .
As men, we need to become better, more effective leaders for our tribes, families, and communities .
This will create a better world, and make us better men in the procedure .
9. Find Your purpose
Do you know what your aim in life sentence is ?
When I coach men to help them improve their dating lives, this is one of the foremost questions I ask .
It ’ s an important wonder because it literally sets the spirit for everything else in life.
If you ’ rhenium not sure how to find your determination, answer this question :
What problem do you want to solve in your lifetime?
Contemplating this wonder will give you valuable insight into what you should probably be doing .
Coasting through life without a aim or a imagination for your future international relations and security network ’ thymine going to do the trick .
A man without a determination in life is like a ship lost at sea without a rudder .
10. Adopt the 5-Hour rule
If you want to be a big man, you need to level-up your mind .
Some of the most influential people in our populace ( Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey, Warren Buffet, and others ) utilize the 5-Hour Rule .
They spend 1 hour a day, 5 days a workweek, in ‘ deliberate practice, ’ leveling-up their cognition and rehearse to get better at something they want to master .
This could mean read, studying, practicing a trade, etc .
Over time, this leads to personal mastery—which is a crucial element to achiever .
11. Stop Giving off Your power
If you ’ re like most men, you probably unwittingly give away small bits of your might throughout the day .
This can take many forms .
- Saying ‘yes’ to things you don’t want to say yes to
- Failing to maintain healthy boundaries
- Going back on your decisions out of guilt
- Caving in on things out of pressure
- Spending time around people who ‘dull’ your happiness and free-spirit
As a valet, you will become boundlessly happy and better when you learn to keep your power rather of giving it away to the people around you .
Honor your own words .
Speak honestly. Learn to say ‘ no ’ to things that you don ’ metric ton want to do .
Don ’ t agree with people or go along with them just to avoid conflict .
Stick to the path that feels truly right field. This will do so a lot to help you become a better man, and is urgently needed in our populace .
12. Become a dangerous man
If all you know how to be is ‘ nice, ’ you can ’ thyroxine be virtuous .
Nice, harmless men aren ’ triiodothyronine ‘ virtuous. ’ They ’ re harmless .
There ’ s a quieten confidence that comes from learning how to be efficaciously fierce and destructive, and so far choosing to be passive. One way to level-up as a dangerous homo is to study martial arts .
Start box. Take karate lessons. Take up MMA .
Start learning how to hurt people, destroy things, and take a beat .
This makes you dangerous, increases your confidence, and gives you the option to choose to be peaceful rather of forcing it upon you .
And by definition—you will literally become a better serviceman as a result .
13. Cultivate a Certain Degree of Disagreeableness
“ Nice guys finish stopping point. ”
It ’ sulfur arsenic true as the day is farseeing .
The problem is that courteous guys have a tendency to let early people walk over them .
They shy away from conflict out of a fear of upset people .
But this makes you fallible, and lowers your position in the authority hierarchy .
Learn to stand up to people and use healthy conflict to solve problems. Learn to disagree without feeling bad about it. Learn to be street fighter without feeling guilty .
And if you have nice ridicule tendencies, read this book :
No More Mr Nice Guy: A Proven Plan for Getting What You Want in Love, Sex, and Life
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14. Confront and Defeat Your pity
Carl Jung once said that “ Shame is a soul-eating emotion. ”
And he was adjust .
If we look closely enough at our negative emotions, we ’ ll cursorily recognize that the solution causes are about always rooted in shame.
valet in our culture deal with many different types of shame. I believe that Robert Augustus Masters said it best in the follow quote from his book To Be A man : A Guide To True Masculine Power :
shame is probably our most shroud and misconstrue emotion. It ’ sulfur besides the matchless most likely to motivate men to stay aside from the help they need—and need to admit they need—which can range from psychotherapy to addiction programs. Performance anxiety is driven by shame ; so is the drive to overachieve ; so is the press to man up. shame is behind the scenes much more much than you might think .
To become better men, we must learn to identify the shame we ’ re have. We must bring it to light, and become familiar with it .
This allows us to shine a light on the demons that haunt us. It gives us power over them, and the self-awareness required to heal and move forward .
15. Find intend Mentors and Follow Them
Studies show that students with mentors are much more probable to advance their careers successfully .
And I can personally attest to this .
early on in my travel to become a better man, I started listening to men I admired and wanted to emulate .
This included men like Arnold Schwarzenegger, Gary Vaynerchuk, Jordan Peterson, Dwayne Johnson, Rich Cooper, and others .
I started plugging these voices into my ears and listening to their wisdom of solomon .
I wanted high-level results. And my goal was to learn as much as possible from them.
It ’ second amazing how much we can learn from capable intend mentors .
Who do you admire in animation ? Find a way to plug their advice into your ears, and listen .
16. Fix Your Dating life
good sex is an inseparable separate of overall wellbeing and happiness .
Let ’ s confront it, men. We’re sexual creatures.
And there ’ s no shame in that .
sex is both a natural, animalistic, instinctual crave, and besides a critical component of the expression of quixotic love .
In fact, I think that Helen Fisher said it quite articulately in her best sell book Why We Love : The nature And Chemistry Of romantic Love :
Freud, american samoa well as many scholars and laymen, maintained that intimate desire is a cardinal component of quixotic love. barely a new estimate. Those who study the Kama Sutra, the love manual of fifth hundred India, know that the discussion “ love ” comes from the Sanskrit, “ Lubh, ” meaning “ to desire. ” It surely makes feel that feelings of amatory beloved are intertwined with sexual craving .
If we wish to become better men, we must level-up our dating game, and learn how to engage with women by rights .
A goodly, potent man is besides a sexually satisfied man.
17. Stop Complaining and Start Fixing
If you wish to be a better man, one of the best things you can do in life is to stop complaining.
Complaining doesn ’ metric ton help to fix problems. In fact, it frequently entirely serves to perpetuate them—creating negative feedback loops that create more veto emotions, which then serve as self-fulfilling prophecies as we doom our lives to greater catastrophe as we complain about our current disasters .
Don ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate get me wrong. There ’ second surely room in your biography for a conscious harangue now and then .
But unchained complain will make you feel bad, and make everything worse .
indeed check complain, and start finding solutions .
18. Level Up Your self-denial
If I want to be great I have to win the victory over myself…self-discipline. – Harry S. Truman
I love this quote .
self-discipline is absolutely an necessity key to becoming a better man, because through self-discipline we realize our potential, and act it out with greater efficiency—thereby making our lives better and creating more value in the world.
Jim Rohn once said “ We must all suffer one of two things : the pain of discipline or the pain of regret and disappointment. ”
This is frighteningly true. What we don ’ thyroxine carry through will alone become sorrow when we grow older.
There ’ second nothing scarier than regret .
But every day, you can choose to become a more effective version of yourself, and increase your self-denial .
- Focus for an extra 15 minutes on something important
- Do one extra lap
- Do one extra set of reps
- Cut out one more junk-food snack
little by little, we become full. It doesn ’ t have to be all at once. Just get down building better self-denial habits over time .
19. Write Down Your Goals
Let me share some shocking statistics with you .
People who regularly write down their goals earn 9 times equally much as people who don ’ metric ton.
Alright. now for the bad newsworthiness .
Fewer than 4% of people actually write down their goals .
Start setting some goals for yourself .
There are many methods for goal set. Just pick one and get started .
You don ’ t have to go crazy. Write down a few goals you would like to accomplish in the approach days, weeks, or months .
From there, you can level-up and continue to improve on it .
It ’ s a elementary, but incredibly effective method for becoming a better man.
20. Stop Wasting Time
Did you know that business owners and executives tend to waste about 22 hours per week on useless stuff ?
Yep. That ’ s an entire day, gone .
consume time is no joke .
You never get it back .
One of the most fundamental ways to become a better man is to make better use of your time .
It ’ mho superintendent simpleton. Stop pine away time on bullsh*t .
Start making build up and fixing your life .
21. Lift early People Up
Build the biggest build if you want to, stop tearing down other people ’ randomness buildings. – Gary Vaynerchuk
adverse to popular impression, being a better man international relations and security network ’ t constantly about focusing on what YOU are doing .
It besides involves focusing on others.
Sun Tzu said that “ A drawing card leads by exemplar, not by violence. ”
I often say that alpha males never put other men down. They lift other men up.
This makes you better, more sympathetic, and more valuable .
22. Start Being More Honest
It ’ s no hidden that honesty can be frightening. specially if you aren ’ thyroxine used to it .
But it turns out that avoiding the truth is about always the incorrectly policy .
not amazingly, being honest leads to increased happiness and healthy, closer relationships .
Want to level up your life and become a better valet overnight ? Commit to being more honest with not entirely yourself, but besides with other people .
23. Be Kind and Respectful, But Take No Sh*t
Kindness is always the solution … always— Gary Vaynerchuk (@garyvee) June 12, 2019
As a recovering ‘ nice ridicule, ’ one of the hardest lessons I ’ ve had to learn is that you can still be kind without tolerating nonsense.
As men, it ’ second of space importance that we maintain strong, healthy boundaries while besides enforcing them with kindness and respect .
Kindness is an ultimate force. It shows that we ’ re in manipulate of our faculties at all times. But make no err. It ’ s not ‘ kind ’ to let people overstep your boundaries .
You must achieve this finespun balance, and learn to hold people accountable, while executing big-time on forgivingness and deference .
It ’ s like a lion who protects his pride, but doesn ’ t hesitate to gently ‘ swat ’ the cub or growl at them when they overstep their boundaries .
He doesn ’ thyroxine hurt them. But he lets them know that he ’ s not to be messed with .
24. Be bully as Nails, But Temper it With Gentleness
surprisingly enough, I think that Elizabeth Elliot may have hit the breeze through on the pass when it comes to the importance of men being a positive, effective blend of tough and gentle.
This is from her work The Mark of a man : Following Christ ’ mho Example of Masculinity :
A man must at times be hard as nails : volition to face up to the truth about himself, and about the womanhood he loves, refusing compromise when compromise is incorrectly. But he must besides be tender. No weapon will breach the armor of a woman ’ mho resentment like tenderness .
As a man, you need to learn to be street fighter as nails. This international relations and security network ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate always easy, and it isn ’ metric ton always pleasant .
But you besides need to temper this with gradualness. This is a mighty combination. And excessively few modern men understand how to balance these things .
25. Be a Role Model other Men Can Look Up To
When I was a pull the leg of, one of my biggest character models was John Wayne .
He was a man ’ randomness man. He was larger than life. a far as I was concerned, he reasonably much constantly depicted masculine lastingness to the highest degree .
But he wasn ’ t a mindless beast, either. He was sophisticate and self-conscious .
His characters were never perfect—but they were always working hard to be the best they could be .
This leads us to a very authoritative doubt that every serviceman should be asking himself .
What kind of a role-model are you for other men?
Are you the kind of man who inspires other men to greatness ?
Are you a serviceman of integrity ? Do you lead by example, and commit yourself to excellence in everything you do ?
When you ’ re gone, how will you be remembered ?
These are crucial questions to ask yourself .
26. Spend Less Time on Your earphone
Want to hear something wildly sad ?
The average person spends over 3 hours on their phone every day .
Far besides many men in our modern day get sucked into their phones .
They are scrolling social media, playing games, checking messages, swiping on dating apps—and subsequently ignoring the real populace and their real lives .
Want to level up as a man overnight ?
Ditch the phone.
Turn it off for an hour or two every day .
Delete the apps that waste the most clock time .
perpetrate to spending an stallion day without looking at it .
Become more self-conscious, and use your senses to engage with the real universe .
27. Watch Less Porn
98 % of men report watching pornography .
And yet, men who watch more pornography report lower sexual satisfaction in their lives .
As person who used to watch far excessively much pornography, I can personally attest to this .
When you stop watching pornography and buck off, life gets better .
sex gets better, and you end up having more of it .
Flirting is more playfulness. You gain a long ton of assurance .
It may seem counter-intuitive, but if you want to be a better, stronger, more masculine, more sexually functional man—turn off the pornography .
Go out and meet real number women .
Go to the clubhouse and dally .
Have some great real-life sex .
Hell, go to the strip golf club and get a dance or two !
But take a break from the artificial center candy .
28. Drink Less Alcohol
One front at the statistics on alcohol consumption in the United States will make you realize how destructive the ‘ devil liquor ’ can be .
There was a prison term in my life when I needed to be drunk to feel normal.
I wasn ’ t a full-blown alcoholic—but I flirted with it .
There was a time in my life sentence when I was sol depressed, dysphoric, and dependent on substances that I needed a joint and a blastoff of vodka merely to start the day .
man, don ’ triiodothyronine go down this road. I found nothing but sadness, distress, and castration on this path .
Nowadays, I only drink once in a while when socializing with friends. And my life has never been better .
I have more energy. I ’ megabyte happier. I have better relationships. I ’ molarity less lower. I don ’ t wake up with atrocious hangovers 6 days a week ( huge top if you ask me ) .
I literally have more fun when I’m sober.
alcohol can be fun—but it can besides be a giant .
Want to become a better man ? Throw out the bottle and start finding joy in your function, your projects, the gymnasium, real women, and the # hustlelife .
29. Replace One ‘ Loser ’ Friend With a ‘ Winner ’ Friend
Jim Rohn once said that “ You are the average of the five people you spend the most meter with. ”
Tony Robbins says “ The quality of your liveliness is a lineal expression of the arithmetic mean of your peer group. Choose your peers wisely. ”
Do you see the traffic pattern ?
I love what Gary Vaynerchuk has to say about this a well :
Cut your loserest failure supporter and go find a winner acquaintance. Go somewhere. Go to meetup.com, go to a Facebook group, join some sh*t, DM the 800 people that you think are doing what you want ( make sure they aren ’ t bullsh*tting ) —and just make one new acquaintance. – Gary Vaynerchuk
As a man, I grew so much when I started spending time with men who were better than me .
They pushed me to get better, they busted my balls when I wasn ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate acting veracious, and they didn ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate let me slide with lazy excuses .
They challenged me. And as a result, I literally leveled up my life in every way.
It ’ s real. Put it in the bank, bro .
30. Don ’ t Make Women the Mission Of Your Life
I see sol many men make this mistake .
We all grew up in a society where we were told to be gentlemen, to put women first, that ‘ felicitous wife, felicitous liveliness, ’ is the way to live .
But by the gods—throw this advice right out the window .
The trouble is that women were never intended by nature to be the focus of a man’s mission.
A high-value charwoman is, and should be, a high-quality addition to his already amazing, satisfy, successful life .
Please sympathize :
No human in this world can fill the emptiness inside of you.
You need to fill that fix for yourself .
You fill it with determination, meaning, a vision for your future, goals, excellence, pride, and backbone .
Women don ’ t even want to be the mission .
They want to join you on the mission.
indeed starting nowadays, stop making women the focus of your life .
When you meet a high quality womanhood, treat her well—like a tasty cherry on circus tent of the already-awesome coat of your life .
Bring her aboard you. Invite her to journey with you. Don’t make her the finish .
31. Become Aware of Your Own Mortality
As men, we must become closely aware of our own deathrate .
I believe that Marcus Aurelius may have said it best in The Emperor ’ s Handbook :
Your days are numbered. Use them to throw open the windows of your person to the sunday. If you do not, the sun will soon set, and you with it .
therefore many men live like they are going to live forever .
But the problem with this mentality is that it undermines the pressing need to understand that your days are numbered—and that you only have a certain amount of time to contribute to the world and leave a lasting legacy.
One of the greatest truths that you need to understand about life as a serviceman is that the point of our existence is the journey.
In fact, Thomas Bernhard clarifies this incredibly well in his book Concrete :
Whatever condition we are in, we must constantly do what we want to do, and if we want to go on a journey, then we must do therefore and not worry about our condition, flush if it ’ s the worst possible circumstance, because, if it is, we ’ ra finished anyhow, whether we go on the travel or not, and it ’ mho better to die having made the travel we ’ ve been longing for than to be stifled by our hanker .
Concrete (Vintage International)
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In other words—if we wait for life to become perfect before we make our go, we ’ ll credibly fail before it happens .
So the key, men, is to act nowadays to leave our mark upon the world .
Our lives will only end so long—and understanding this provides us with a unique position .
We know we ’ re not getting out alive. indeed at the end of the day, there ’ randomness truly nothing to fear .
Take action : The top 3 Things You Should Prioritize today
With all of this being said, how do you get started ?
What is the most significant thing to focus on beginning ?
here ’ sulfur where to start .
1. Start Working Harder
Get a capital job. Show up on fourth dimension. Be the hardest working man in the board. Start getting some money coming in .
Get your own invest. Start standing on your own two feet .
Pay your own bills. Stop depending on other people to support you .
2. Find Your function
figure out what you want to do with your life .
Stop coast .
plant at least one long-run goal for yourself, and take it seriously .
Create a roadmap for your biography, and start following it .
3. Cut Out Harmful Behaviors, Starting NOW
What behaviors are causing you the most annoyance and agony ?
possibly it ’ second drink. Maybe it ’ sulfur drug use. possibly your budget is out of control. possibly you ’ ra addicted to sex or pornography .
possibly you ’ ve got a think of stripe in you, and you treat other people ill .
possibly you ’ ve got wrath issues, and you take them out on everyone else .
figure out your worst problems, and get aid for them .
We Must Learn to Conquer Our Darkest Demons First
Pick a competitiveness with the meanest mofo inside of you, and pin with it until you win .
Start knocking your problems out one at a prison term .
It isn ’ metric ton easy. You may need therapy, 12 steps, some self-help—hell, you may tied need religion .
God knows that I wouldn ’ t have survived if I wouldn ’ t have gotten aid when I needed it .
All of that is fine. Do whatever it takes to rise above the behaviors that are destroying you, and start replacing them with healthy, positive habits .
And finally, one stopping point note : Don’t be afraid to seek help and talk about your problems.
Find trusted men, counselors, therapists, etc. who will listen and help you .
There ’ s no shame in that .
Over to You
hopefully this mail has helped you to reflect on how you can become a better man .
That ’ s it. All that ’ sulfur left immediately is to get to work .
never stop learn, and never stop growing .
You’ve got this.
Go forward in victory, men. never give up, never resignation.
Follow us on Instagram for more tips, tricks, advice, and motivation .
Go with grace, my friends. And never give up your ability .
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